Happy National Lemon Chiffon Day (3/29)

Again with the lemon.  Upon realizing that I’ve about had it with all these fruit desserts, I skimmed ahead to see how many more of them I’ve got left on the list.  It looks like about 25.  I guess I can do that.  There’s only one more time that fruit desserts are back-to-back, and that’s July 31 and August 1 when the list follows National Raspberry Cake Day with National Raspberry Cream Pie Day.  Hopefully I’ll be able to just dump my leftover cake in to create the base ingredient for the next day’s pie.

You know who loves to insist that fruit is a dessert?  Japanese restauranteurs.  They’re constantly offering either an orange slice in a bowl, or a pineapple wedge at the end of meals. As if spanking a whipped cream dollop on top converts the thing.  It’s funny when they try to appease the American needs, yet fail so severely.  Don’t bother asking for ice cream instead either, because it’s green tea ice cream you’ll get which, like fruit, isn’t bad, it’s just not dessert.

Of course, all this harbored disdain for fruit desserts that I have, on top of the fact that I always screw up when I bake, leads up to the fantastic irony that a lemon chiffon cake is completely unavailable here.  There were plenty of bakery type folk who were willing to make me a lemon cake, and there were all kinds of lemon squares available, but a chiffon, that is made with the egg whites folded in separate, which I guess makes it lighter, was nowhere to be found.  So now, I’m something a kin to a building contractor who volunteers for the job of constructing the prison in which he will eventually serve once he gives his guilty plea.  I suppose such a contractor would at least feel some small comfort that the walls that surrounded him were his own.

So, I went out and bought this ridiculous thing, a bundt cake pan.  I don’t know where I’m going to put it, there’s really no cabinet space left in my kitchen for it.    The only other thing I had to buy was cream of tartar.  Doesn’t that sound nasty?  Cream of tartar?  Well it is.  It’s a spice that is extracted from wine barrels after the wine is removed, so basically it’s wine dandruff.

What am I going to say about this lemon chiffon cake. The thing is, I made a cake, something I’ve never done before, and then proceeded to dump a bunch of lemon shavings into the batter.  I made an icing from scratch for the first time, then proceeded to dump a quarter cup of lemon juice into it.   It all just made for an awkward tease and a really funky infusion in my mouth.

A little confession here before I close, the messy cake-like picture at the top there is the lemon chiffon cake that I created, but even that picture is a grandiose version of what I really made.  Here’s what it came out of the pan looking like.  I don’t know what to tell ya, I’m just not a baker.

See you Friday for Turkey Neck Soup Day. 


About Jim Clark

"If it was worth doing, then it is worth writing!" -- Jim Clark -- Someone else probably said that before, and I'm sure that each semester she starts her Creative Writing 101 class by writing it on the board, but I never took that lady's class so I am taking her quote! I work in the world of advertising, but I write for a living. Here in the second decade of the '00s, we find ourselves in a culture where virtually everyone writes for a living. With all the clicking and clacking on Facebook, Twitter, emails and texts, our lives are more than ever intertwined with writing. At the same time, it's also become increasingly more important to shorten our thoughts down to as few characters as possible. So, now, more than ever, I think it's also important to hold a place in our lives for expanding and honing our thoughts through writing. This is my place for that.
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