Shower Me With Kisses & Hoagies

Any time I put a song onto a video that I edited together, I’m always amazed at how certain points in the song magically and perfectly coincide with the video elements that are on-screen at that moment, like the famous stoner phenomena of playing Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon while watching “The Wizard of Oz.”

The National  <insert food> Day List runs similar sometimes, in that the day’s food holiday will fall perfectly, like on today’s National Hoagie Day.  It’s borderline Myan planning that this sandwich, which is in other regions known as a “hero” sandwich, would be celebrated on the day that “The Avengers” premiers across the country.  Especially because to eat a hoagie, you have to have a stomach made of Iron, Man.  I mean, it really is a Hulk of a sandwich!  I ate one and the whole rest of the day, my tummy was Thor.  Alright, alright I’m done. Back to the hoagie.

Have you ever wondered if there was a difference between a submarine sandwich, a hoagie and a hero? I never did. I’ve always heard the Italian bread they’re all served on described as a hoagie roll, “You want that on a hoagie roll?” they say.  Still, I’ve never actually ordered a hoagie outside of a shop that’s labeled Hoagie on the outside.

It turns out that’s because hoagie’s are pretty much unique to Philadelphia.  It’s a pretty serious deal there.  A hard and fast definition of a hoagie, however, seems to have slipped through the multitude of shops trying to sell one more sandwich.  The menu at my local hoagie joint, Hobbit Hoagie, pretty much calls everything a hoagie, even if it just contains meatballs.  Still, I did find some pretty adamant sandwich creators and food enthusiasts who made decent arguments that a hoagie should absolutely contain Italian ham, prosciutto, salami and provolone cheese.  It also looks like if you are going to order a hoagie that passes Philladelphia muster, it’s going to have to contain as close to “the works” as you are capable of keeping down.  This means that if you’re one of these, “Ummm… I’ll just have some lettuce, tomato, and light mayonnaise,” then you not only didn’t order a hoagie, you probably just ordered at Subway. Don’t forget to get your “fresh” cookie with that combo.

The hoagie I got was as authentic as I could make happen.  It was a hybrid of what Publix’s deli called an “Itallian” on their menu. I made them substitute the capicola for prosciutto, but that was probably an unnesessary step considering I really didn’t even know what capicola is.  It’s the same, just a little more fatty.

It should be mentioned that today was also National Candied Orange Peel Day, which sounds pretty unique, but there was never a moment when I didn’t know that National Hoagie Day was going to be where my payload came from.

Tomorrow Cinco De Mayo falls on the same day as The Kentucky Derby, so we’ll all be drinking and eating quite a bit I’m sure, but the list kindly doesn’t make the 5th “food holiday,” so I’ll be eating tacos and drinking bourbon.  Viva los caballos! 


About Jim Clark

"If it was worth doing, then it is worth writing!" -- Jim Clark -- Someone else probably said that before, and I'm sure that each semester she starts her Creative Writing 101 class by writing it on the board, but I never took that lady's class so I am taking her quote! I work in the world of advertising, but I write for a living. Here in the second decade of the '00s, we find ourselves in a culture where virtually everyone writes for a living. With all the clicking and clacking on Facebook, Twitter, emails and texts, our lives are more than ever intertwined with writing. At the same time, it's also become increasingly more important to shorten our thoughts down to as few characters as possible. So, now, more than ever, I think it's also important to hold a place in our lives for expanding and honing our thoughts through writing. This is my place for that.
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