Happy National Almond Buttercrunch Day! (6/29)

Aright listen, I’m going to be totally candid right up front. I looked at the recipe for these things, and didn’t really believe in it. So, I tried to make something I was more familiar with, a Heath Bar Bark, while still retaining some of the integrity of the Almond Buttercrunch thingy that I was meant to eat today.

There needs to be a sidebar here real quick.  The List of food stuffs that I’m following takes too many damn days off! So many that I’m thinking of shopping around for a back up list for those days when nothing’s showing up on this one. I’ve noticed that this list gives not only too many days off, but often times in significant clusters. This pattern of on and off, I find, is making me significantly lazy.  Lazy in not only my writing, but lazy in my cooking/eating of things.

Now, sur, I’m an admitted awful baker, but I really just didn’t get how this concoction could have turned out so badly. All the recipes I consulted purported that combining some butter and sugar would create this “candy.” Well, according to the steps that I followed, it simply didn’t.

Too Much Stirring

Then, after I finished ruining it and trying it, I read the fine print, which read, “Stir till it starts to boil, then do not stir or shake.” Oops! I didn’t do that. Stupid baking! Baking always has kind of obvious secret that is screamed right there in the middle.  Give me a complex, thirty-five ingredient gumbo over a four ingredient cake or cookie any day of the week.

Just didn’t turn out.

My finished product was just a mass of crumbly, buttery sugar with some hard chocolate on top. Of course, who can say that’s not delicious in and of itself, but eating it kind of smacked of the days of being a kid and eating sugar cubes at the church reception hall.

Pepperidge Farm Milano Almond Slices

Of course I did have a backup plan. Pepperage Farms makes a cookie called Milano Slices that is an almond, buttery, crunchy thing. So, it’s got all the ingredients, right? I figure that between the failure of the thing that I made, and the flawless, light wafery delight that Pepperidge Farms produced, I did pretty alright after taking the list’s mandated sabbatical.

Now, beginning July 1st, The List goes a good two weeks straight, and I’m really looking forward to getting back on track.

I hope you’ll join me on January 1st for National Gingersnap Day.


About Jim Clark

"If it was worth doing, then it is worth writing!" -- Jim Clark -- Someone else probably said that before, and I'm sure that each semester she starts her Creative Writing 101 class by writing it on the board, but I never took that lady's class so I am taking her quote! I work in the world of advertising, but I write for a living. Here in the second decade of the '00s, we find ourselves in a culture where virtually everyone writes for a living. With all the clicking and clacking on Facebook, Twitter, emails and texts, our lives are more than ever intertwined with writing. At the same time, it's also become increasingly more important to shorten our thoughts down to as few characters as possible. So, now, more than ever, I think it's also important to hold a place in our lives for expanding and honing our thoughts through writing. This is my place for that.
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